Labels: BDSM

So for this one I am just going to group it all into one. Since its all rooted in the same.

So BDSM and what does it mean to you?

Is it that you like being hurt, attacked, molested? No and yes to a degree.

BDSM to me is being able to let go of the everyday grime and not have to think about work, kids, and all my other stresses in life.  

So since I gave you a few contrite labels for myself.  I shall elaborate on them for you. But first a very dear friend wrote about "ish" and all of these are my "ishes"  I am not completely 100% anything when it comes to BDSM.   I am Domme(ish), Sub(ish), top(ish), Bottom(ish). Now if you all understand that, that's great.  For you who don't I shall elaborate on each of these "ishes"  and maybe just maybe it will be better understood.

First  Domme(ish). I am not completely a domme nor do I wanna be. Reason for that is rather simple, I rather not have to take care of someone 24/7.  Make sure they are alright. Some of you would say then that makes you a top.   I say no cause to me a top doesn't keep control the whole time (will elaborate in top(ish) portion after)  Now I need to clarify this some more I have never been a domme in any scene or session. This is something that fascinates me and would love to try.  

Second Sub(ish). I am submissive by nature when it comes to men and women.  That stems from my upbringing of never making the first move and letting others dictate what is going to happen. Whether be it sexually or professionally.  I have always been old school in that way.  I am learning to change that, so this is why the "ishes".  I don't mind leaving all control and decisions at the door.  I am however never gonna be a 24/7 sub/slave.  That is def not for me.

Third top(ish).  Now this one has been the most prevailing of them all throughout my actual long term relationships.  What I mean by that is once I got comfortable enough with someone that I am sexually involved with.  I will speak up and tell them "I want to be fucked right now" or "eat me" and of course that is only if they wish to. Hence not completely domme nor top. 

Fourth Bottom(ish).  So this one would probably describe me the best, at the moment. Cause I am not living this lifestyle as I would like.  It is only when my fiancee remembered or felt like being kinky (since he is more vanilla than I am) 

So If I had to give myself a percentage for all of these I believe at the moment this is what they would be:
Domme 5%
Submissive 20%
Top 15%
Bottom  60%

But like I was saying these could change from now till whenever.  Which is why on fetlife I have myself labelled as a kinkster.  Cause there is just not one that fits 100%.

Plus my moods change depending on the situation that I am in. It all depends on the company I keep and the surrounding area.  

Same as there is certain kinks that claim me as sub or bottom.  (Those are for later when I feel the need to touch base on my kinks.)